Monday, December 5, 2011

What came first, the camel, or the rabbit?

My second class back was amazing, despite all the doubts that were racing through my mind, "I ate too much this morning, I haven't had enough water, this morning, I didn't get enough sleep, etc. etc. " My lovely friend Allie was teaching, she knows what I am capable of, she won't let me quit. I find that my mental state has changed since the last times I spent in the hot room. I am focusing on TRULY letting go of all expectations in the room, letting the instructors words co-erse my body through the postures, never anticipating the next step, really listening for the cues, it is much harder than one would imagine.
Its hard to not bring anything with you to yoga (anxiety, angst, nausea, emotions from outside etc) I feel like thats my main focus right now, leaving my stuff at the door if you will (though I will admit, in the last few savasana's after I had had this epiphany, I found myself thinking about how I was going to write about it later) I really tried to picture all the good things happening to my body and let go of anything I was feeling without going to much inside my own head, which is also harder than one may think. This all (and always does ) came out when I did my first Camel pose (for those of you who don't know about camel, I will post a brief description of all the postures as soon as I can) and as I was in that first sweet backward bend I literally pictured all of my negative energy and reservations, emotions, all the things I had been holding on to, flowing out of my fingers, down my feet, and out onto the floor where it left me for good. Then it all clambered back in during rabbit! Hahaha. I have sometimes held a grudge against rabbit because it pains me so, but I know thats good, and I can't have a camel without a rabbit so I guess I'll have to keep trying. Always keep trying. Be the change you want to see.
Namaste

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